Last week, we shared three keys to effective communication in the workplace.  The first three keys included focusing and being clear, listening to understand, not to respond, and valuing and respect different perspectives  Now, we’re back with four more ways that people can do a better job collaborating with their managers, colleagues, and reports through sharpening their communication skills.

The fourth key for effective communication is ensuring that you identify the communication preferences of your audience. Based on Human Patterns®, people attend to four general types of information:  Who, Why, How, and What. Who speaks to the expectations of work—what will they need to do to accomplish a task and how their performance will help others execute their own tasks are the main concerns of some people.

Why speaks to the need for others to know how the work and associated tasks relate to the goals and mission of the organization. Some people are most interested in the decisions or purpose behind the communication.  How addresses the relevant processes and procedures necessary to accomplish the work, as well as elements like budget.

With regard to What, the major drivers are succinct, action-oriented directives and the timelines associated with them. People who respond most to the What want to know time-frames above all else.

Failure to understand these different types of communication preferences among your peers will cause them to tune you out. Use your knowledge of each person’s preferences to tailor your message accordingly. You must see past your own personal information preferences or biases in order to correctly ascertain the communication needs of your colleagues. Quickly recognize when you fail to get someone the information out of his preferred order, re-set, and go about communicating in the right way.

Next, adapt to non-verbal and behavioral clues. If you’re not paying non-verbal communication its due, you’re missing out on 95% of all human communication! Non-verbal communication can include eye movement, tone of voice, posture, facial expressions, and gestures.

Keys to understanding non-verbal and behavior clues include asking questions if you notice incongruent behaviors. If you’re confused by non-verbal signals, ask questions. Also, feel free to repeat to the person your interpretation of their response, and then ask for clarification if you’ve made and incorrect perception.

Also, make sure to consider these gestures or clues collectively. Sometimes a single gesture or movement can actually betray what your colleague is really thinking. Thus, if you place too much credence in a particular element of their body language, you risk drawing incorrect conclusions.

Avoid rushed interpretations and certainly accusations. No one likes to be labeled a liar, and analyzing body language is an imperfect science.  Incorrect accusations based on erroneous observations can be embarrassing, damaging, and take a long time to overcome.  Verify your interpretation with gentle questioning such as “I get the feeling you’re uncomfortable with this course of action. Would you like to add something to the discussion?” 

Gentle questioning should draw out the real message the other person is trying to convey, without risking their alienation based on your own perceptions.  Remember that we all send mixed messages from time to time for a wide array of reasons.  Don’t presume you know all the answers!

The sixth key for effective communication is to understand when to address or avoid sensitivities and hot button issues in others.  Follow the old adage, think before you speak. Don’t rush into your own words with people.  Based on the context and importance of the message, you need to prepare yourself to either address the person’s sensitivity or avoid it completely. Different situations call for different measures of communication.

There are six common sensitivities or hot buttons identified by Human Patterns® that most people have –others taking advantage of them, experiencing humiliation and embarrassment, ground rules changing arbitrarily, being unskilled or uninformed, finding themselves in risky situations, and boredom or redundancy.  You have a strategy at your disposal to address each of these sensitivities.

For those who fear others taking advantage of them, be exceptionally forthright and direct. Never gloss over relevant information, or they will assume you are hiding key knowledge from them. For those who fear humiliation or embarrassment, start by accentuating their positive traits, and position any negatives—always in private settings!—as ways to provide constructive feedback or to fix performance problems so that those positive perceptions persist.

Some people perceive any change as the rules of the game changing mid-game—for them, you must keep change in small doses, and make them aware of changes ahead of time, if possible, so that they can properly integrate the impact of the change into their rules mentality.  They need predictability and consistency, so give it to them.

Others hate being perceived, by themselves or others, as not up to a task.  For those who feel that they may be in over their heads, start with them by praising what they do well, and place any constructive feedback or insufficient performance in a learning and development context.   Place their need for honing certain skills and expertise in their work as an opportunity for them to achieve more wide-ranging mastery.

Finally, for people who tend to become bored or feel their position is redundant, acknowledge ways they can bring innovation, variety and something new to the workplace.  Know this preference with them, but also guide them in the ways the company requires consistency and efficiency to effectively achieve the goals of the team.

The final key to effective communication and certainly of great importance is to always be open, honest, and accountable. Don’t be judgmental or argumentative, and keep an open mind to the feelings and ideas shared by others.

Be up-front with others, and let them know your position—never make them second-guess your own wants and needs.  Always be open and honest—never stretch the truth, even if it feels right.  Sending mixed signals only creates complicated, dysfunctional relationships later.  So even when you are having misgivings of your own, make sure that what you eventually communicate is an idea to which you are solidly committed to yourself.

In conclusion, welcome and respect the courage of others to be honest with you.  And with this welcoming mentality, also be responsible and accountable when you fail to communicate properly. Often, when you feel like others aren’t hearing you, the problem lies with your own communication.  Knowing you’re not perfect today helps you to become a better communicator tomorrow.

Effective interpersonal communication is the foundation for successful performance and growth in both your career and personal life.  Communication skills enable you to better lead, influence and build relationships with others by developing trust, reducing conflict and misunderstanding, and improving productivity. 

Through our work in leadership development, talent management, and coaching executives, managers, and employees at dozens of profitable, sustainable companies, we have determined a mix of seven keys to effective communication in the workplace:

1. Focus and be clear
2. Listen to understand, not to respond
3. Value and respect different perspectives
4. Identify communication preferences of your audience
5. Adapt to non-verbal and behavioral clues
6. Address or avoid sensitivities and hot buttons of your audience
7. Always be open, honest and accountable

In today’s post, we’ll discuss the first three keys.

First, you must focus and be clear.  This key speaks to the notion that you value your own time, and thus you should value the time of others you deal with in the workplace.  Get to the point when providing information, while avoiding lengthy, unnecessarily-detailed answers.

You should also remember to stay on message, being absolutely clear with regard to the ideas you need to express, especially within the expressed purpose of the conversation. To this end, you should answer questions directly and provide important information only. Just as the best writers distill thousands of words into the hundreds of words that pack the most punch, you should do the same with how you speak with your managers, colleagues, and reports.

Next, you must listen to understand, not to respond.  This concept is pretty difficult for even the smartest among us.  To make this happen, you need to apply common sense—listen more than talk.  Also, avoid urges to interrupt or object on the fly, without hearing out the other person’s thoughts in their entirety.

This should go without saying, but in order to properly listen, you should be engaged in the conversation.  Stop what you’re doing—put away the gadgets (smartphones, TV), minimize the potential for interruptions, and remove physical barriers such as desks, walls, and doors between you and the other person.

As you give the other person more opportunity to speak, be careful to pay attention to not just what is being said, but what is not being said. There are many of us who edit our thoughts quite a bit, never completely sharing what’s on our minds—a good listener can read between the lines and pick up these unspoken thoughts throughout a conversation.

Think through your responses to others after taking proper time to listen. Focus your attention on understanding someone’s message instead of formulating your response.  Being unafraid to give proper consideration, not only to what others have to say but also how you express your own thoughts and reactions, garners respect in professional environments.  Be patient in the process and remember that many people mistrust quick answers.

You must also value and respect different perspectives.  First, you must recognize the value of what others say and their reason and right to say it.

If you’re really seeking to value and respect another person’s perspective, you need to focus on understanding that perspective, not on agreeing or disagreeing with it.  Involve that person in even more conversation than you normally would somebody with whom you share much agreement, asking more questions versus making more declarative statements.  We’ve found that people tend to normally make statements at a rate eight times the number of questions they ask!

Ultimately, do you understand the other person’s perspective, or what they’re even trying to say?  If you’re not sure, simply ask more questions. Remember, your message is not about you or what you may want in a given situation—you want to know what the other party values and why their message is important to them.

In next week’s post, we will cover the four additional keys to effective communication.